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[threnodeity]

rose lalonde

Rose Strider. Grimoire expert and future emissary to the old gods. Say what you wish.

VOICE | TEXT | VIDEO | ACTION

Comments

[threnodeity]

I can assure you with 100% certainty that Roxy and Dirk discuss penises on a daily basis, to and of great lengths.

[ha ha

Also, don't mind her. She's making notes of all this.]

I'm concerned for Jade. Her mother posted a picture of their family on the network. If this company possesses our real names, it's likely they know of the Wolf family already... though that isn't much of a reassurance.

[parodeity]

what
why can you assure me of this
are you guys having like powwows about dicks without me????????
thats ice cold and also unfair
if theres going to be secret strider meetups about dicks i want to be included
even if that sounds sort of awkward and uncomfortable

yeah im worried about that too
i mean
there are some other pictures around as well like say
the things people took as profile pics but
at the very least mr wolf is the most terrifying criminal deterrant ever but i cant help worrying
im also worried about why we were picked or how or what for but like
i guess im not telling anyone else that for the time being
it wont help
but you probably knew that anyway

[threnodeity]

I was under the impression such incestuous and vigorous discourse over dicks would render you uncomfortable. You are not quite ready for a solid dick.

[If anything were to happen to those she knew, the culprit behind the app wouldn't be safe. It didn't matter who it was. Rose would find them and drag them into the light -- dramatic as it sounded, it's how she feels. There's no indication the situation will grow that dire, yet... she has a bad feeling about all of this.]

As your twin, it would be inexcusable for me not to be aware.

Frustrating as it may be, we will have to wait and see. Who knows? More features may be revealed in the coming days.

[parodeity]

look you all cant leave me out of discussions even if they make me mad uncomfortable
invite me to the secret dicks talks rose this is unconscionable not already having done so
i deserve to be at them
im a strider and i can innuendo with the best of them

and yeah
just like im aware how youre actually feeling about it
but theres no reason to mention actual feelings
which we definitely do not possess on this topic

yeah yeah ill wait
btw whats your bet on how long before dirk breaks and uses the damn thing
instead of glowering at us for having already broken
i give him like a day tops

[threnodeity]

You are the youngest. We should be fighting to preserve your innocence.

I believe he is already there.
For all his scoldings, he is no better than his siblings.

[parodeity]

you said "should" not "will" so thats an invite

i mean obviously hes at least reading everything
did he scold you for using it too then
i think we should all three scold him when he breaks
just 2 be fair

[threnodeity]

You are awfully eager for dicks, Dave.

I have yet to receive a sound scolding. I think you are his preferred target.

[parodeity]

i feel like we hit the minimum 3 limit here
or does all this still count as one

is this because im youngest
all you all are ageist i cant believe this

[threnodeity]

You are a delicate, pampered infant who must be protected at all costs.

uwu

[parodeity]

oh my god youre only a few minutes less an infant than me you know this
i stg i always get penalized for being a gentleman and letting you out of the womb first

[threnodeity]

There, there. You will always be our darling younger brother.

[parodeity]

all you guys suck and i dont love you
btw do you want like hot chocolate
im making me some and i can make you some
we have those jumbo marshmallows too
so i guess more accurately i am making myself a little bit of jumbo marshmallow dip
and there will be lots of hot water left over

[threnodeity]

I would like extra marshmallows in mine.

I will be down in 5.

[parodeity]

can do soul sister
see you in 5

[threnodeity]

[Aaaaand she's sauntering down as she said she would, dressed in a cozy orange hoodie that's befitting for the winter's chill.]

[parodeity]

[ and there's dave with two mugs of hot chocolate with Lots of Marshmallows. ...and a bag of marshmallows. he's in black pajama pants and a red hoodie and he'll slide hers across the counter to her, leaning on said counter with his elbows. ]

So, how'd your day go?

[ like he probably saw her periodically throughout but. in the times he did not! ]

[threnodeity]

[Dave is always aware of how to properly prepare refreshments. That's what makes him a great twin! With her marshmallow-laden hot chocolate cupped between her hands, Rose sits.]

It went well, mysteries aside.

[parodeity]

Are there any, like, non-mysterious developments I should be aware of? New wizardbooks, school horror stories. Holy shit college stuff I guess?

[ how are they almost fucking graduated he's not ready for this. ]

[threnodeity]

[College is something she's thoroughly planned for. She knows which schools she wants to apply to, what programs she wants to join, etc. etc. The idea of moving out of Recolle is a little strange but... isn't that part of growing up? If she preoccupies herself with the idea of preparing for a career versus moving away from her family, it won't feel too bittersweet.]

Are you worried about the future, Dave?

[She sips her chocolate.]

Rest assured, I'll still stalk you to your college of choice to knock upon your windows at obscene hours of the night.

[parodeity]

[ dave is staying in recolle - who would ever want to leave? like, maybe dave once upon a time when leaving recolle was a thing people still did, but - but it's extremely strange to consider moving out and on. he might do what roxy's doing and just stay at home while doing college. that might be lame, though. ]

That shouldn't make me feel better. [ he makes a face. ] It's just weird to think that we're at that age? Like, we're literally gonna be done with highschool in a few months and then...college bound. And I'm still like - what do I wanna do? Film? Paleontology? Both? That would be a weird combo. I don't think I wanna do photography shit professionally, or dance, but.

[ it could be fun to take classes like that? god rose is the one with the plan, for sure ]

[threnodeity]

[She gives a little laugh.]

If you become a director you can incorporate as many hobbies as you want into your films.

[Just pointing that out!!]

[parodeity]

Well, that's a point in the pro column for filmography.

[ although does anyone really want to give dave the power to make movies?? really? ]

But if I did that as a major I'd still want to minor in like, y'know. Dead shit.

[ that's not the name of the field of study, you literally just used the word, dave. ]

[threnodeity]

Become a mortician.

[Isn't your sister so helpful, Dave??]

[parodeity]

Grell is one, it doesn't seem that bad, but I'm more interested in stuff that's been dead for like, longer than that.

[ he will just respond like she's being serious even though he knows she ISN'T BEING HELPFUL, but. ]

So, regale me with your longset college plan again.

[threnodeity]

[His answer has her make a face of mock disgust. She's familiar with his love for both old and odd shit. More than anything, she wants him to find a profession he would actually work well with. Dave's a strange kid. He needs something that'll occupy and challenge him -- she can't picture him working an 8-5 desk job.]

It's hardly a plan.

[Just do it. That's Rose's motto.]

The short of it is that I'll double major in psychology and English -- two of the most useless degrees if you cannot claw your way to a Master's. The long of it... I've compiled it into a twenty page summary, if you really want to read it.